I’m from Iowa and around here, we young Christians get married, and we do it fast. My best friend got married three years ago when she was nineteen. I’ve been a bridesmaid twice already, before the age of twenty one.
I can’t tell you how many good-looking Christian guys I’ve scoped from far away to find out nope, some lucky lady already snagged him. There are weddings every weekend. Every day, facebook lets me know who is engaged, who is newly married, and who has their first kid.
So yeah, I know that I’m single. The world constantly tells me. My friends are constantly trying to set me up (and hey, I’m not opposed to it, but nine times out of ten, it just isn’t a good prospect), and the world is constantly telling me it’s okay to be single all while looking at me and wondering why I don’t have a man.
Well, I don’t know why. Maybe I’m not ready, maybe he’s not ready. Maybe he’s a doctor helping out underprivileged families in Africa and we won’t meet until he comes back state side. I just don’t know (though I’m pretty sure it’s that last one, to be honest).
But I’m not worried about it. It would be nice to find a husband, but is that my only goal in life?
NO.
Should it be anyone’s only goal in life?
NOPE.
My point here is, don’t treat Christian men and women of any age (especially a tender, young age like 22) like they must be waiting around for ‘the one’. Maybe the one isn’t out there. Maybe God is the only one you’re going to get (He’s the best one, after all). Maybe your life will be entirely fulfilling and wonderful and you’ll never get married. Maybe you’ll adopt five kids on your own and be the most SPECTACULAR parent that’s ever lived and you’ll dedicate those children to Jesus right out the gate and wonder how you could have ever considered waiting for a spouse to raise children with when you’re so capable of loving and caring for them on your own.
Maybe you’ll never have kids or a spouse at all. Paul seemed pretty stoked about it, didn’t he? I can tell you that I look up to Paul more than almost anyone else (aside from Jesus Himself) and Paul even spoke against marriage.
That isn’t the message we’re getting today. Constantly I’m asked about my relationship status, more than anything else. People ask me if I’m dating anyone more than they ask about my job, my family, my friends, my spiritual life… it could so easily lead anyone to believe, therefore, that finding that special someone is the most important thing you can do with your life.
It is not!
God made men and women for each other but above that, He made us to serve and love Him–and that’s what I’m going to do, whether it’s my husband at my side or all my wonderful friends and family.
So please, next time you speak with a single young person, ask them how their day is going, how their education or job is treating them, how their family is, what they’re reading or what TV show they’re hooked on, how their spiritual life is progressing–if they want to talk about their love life (and often, I do!), they’ll bring it up to you. If they want to be set up so badly, they’ll ask if you know anyone.
They’ve got a lot going on and most of it has nothing to do with finding a spouse. ASK THEM ABOUT IT. Ask us about it!
And for heaven’s sake, don’t tell them that singleness is a gift from God. We know, trust me… we know.
Live the Adventure 